Tag Archives: humor

Mists of Pandaria Compilation Album

It’s time again for the compilation album I make for my guild. While not all of it will make sense, I think there’s enough cross over in the boss mechanics from Siege that you guys can appreciate some of this!

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And a bonus album!

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Do You Remember the Time…?

If you’ve been in a guild for any amount of time, you have stories. You know the ones I mean: they become guild jokes, nicknames, and when you need encouraging between wipes, they come up during AFK’s. I adore story time.

I’m not going to tell every story, especially not the ones that are still in circulation–some things are meant to be just ours, after all–but I wanted to recount a couple of stories from our raiding history. More importantly, I want to know YOUR stories.

Pull up a seat on my story rug; here are two of ours:

The Ember of Azzinoth is Not a Good Raider

Image from Wowhead.com

Go back in time with me to Black Temple. Illidan dropped some nifty weapons, but the focus was all on the legendaries, as usual. Take your eyes off the shiny glaives for a minute and take a look at the Shard of Azzinoth.

It’s a dagger, green and smoky and glowy and rogue-y. Here’s the text from the weapon: “Chance on hit: Calls forth an Ember of Azzinoth to protect you in battle for a short period of time.”

This dagger ended up in the hands of one of our notorious rogues. We won’t discuss why he was notorious. At any rate, he equipped his shiny new dagger and proudly carried it into our next raid. We ooh’d and ahh’d a bit over the Ember, but otherwise we didn’t think about it much…

Right up until we headed to Reliquary of Souls. For those of you who didn’t experience the walk to RoS, a brief explanation:  it was a gauntlet down a long hallway full of ghosts. You’d run as a tight group, AoE the ones you pulled, run again, and AoE again. And you would never, ever, ever attack the mobs before the tank called for AoE. Good raiders don’t attack before they’re told to.

The Ember of Azzinoth is NOT a good raider. Halfway through the gauntlet, the Ember spawned. Pets that were not strictly player-controlled were still kind of idiotic then, and a randomly spawned pet? Even worse. He took his big, glowy butt right into the middle of the ghosts and killed us all.

Do not invite this guy to your raid, or do so at your own peril.

HAI KALECGOS!

Image from Wowwiki.com.

No one likes long run backs. Mass rez is SO BEAUTIFUL. /tear. I didn’t get to experience the Molten Core run back when it was content, but I’ve heard it was brutal. I did get to do Serpentshrine Cavern, because nothing’s more fun than swimming through a narrow tunnel when you’re a wisp. Really, try it.

One night while we were working on Kalecgos in Sunwell Plateau, we were doing a run back…again. We’d even pulled and reset to get some more people rezzed. We were recovering, a bunch of us seated outside of his circle, eating and drinking our way back to full health. A few people were still running back.

I think a lot of us have employed auto run for these moments. Sit back, let your character do the work while you eat a sandwich, it makes perfect sense–until you drop a tomato on your lap. Or your dog tries to take a bite from it. Or your wife complains that you didn’t make HER a sandwich. Whatever the reason, you look away.

One of those running back that particular night was a priest. I always watched for people coming into my range so that I could buff as soon as everyone was there (I actually remembered to buff when I was a healer…). I saw the priest light up on my Grid. Then I saw him gallop past me.

Then I watched him run right smack up to Kalecgos’s face.

The random yelling on vent and everyone scrambling was worth it.

What About You?

Like I said, I love story time. I KNOW there are other stories out there. I know as you were reading this you were instantly reminded of some moments of your own.

Tell me a story!

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Capture Caption #2

Realms being down (boo!) seems like a good opportunity for round 2 (yay!).

Here’s a reminder of Sunday’s picture:

And here are the captions!

1. Worgen bear camouflage: be the carpet. (Wade)

2. Bear make-out session! (@dondelorox)

3. Bear is looking for the last dropped easter egg. The draw of chocolate is more powerful than the fear of dead bear carpet. (Andrew)

4. “Where’s the money, Lebowski?”
“It’s down there somewhere, let me have another look.” (Jalindrine)

5. He’s obviously wondering where the rest of the other bear went…..poor thing. (Cassierose)

6. I don’t need Threat Plates to tell me I have aggro! (Ultraking)

Which one is your favorite? You can tell me in the comments below! While you’re there, give me a caption for this week’s screenshot (or send me a mention @battlechicken on Twitter):

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Blizzcon From Home Part 1: Blizzcon Pick-up Lines

Let’s face it, the expense of flying out to California may be too much for some of us, or we may have been just one person too far down the queue to buy our ticket. But whatever the reason, we are the ones who didn’t make it to Blizzcon.

There’s the virtual ticket, of course; but that doesn’t get you into the social experiences at all. Fear not, fair, poor, and/or unlucky citizens of Azeroth! Twitter and Tastes Like Battle Chicken is coming to your aide in Part 1 of my Blizzcon From Home series.

Without further adieu, I give you Blizzcon Pick-Up Lines! Continue reading

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Things I Would Do For a Beta Invite

There are things I like: Pandora, potato chips, dill pickles, Mythbusters.

There are things I crave: Diet Pepsi, Cheez-It Hot & Spicy, 5 minutes of QUIET.

And then there are things I’m desperate for: my husband (rawr!), and a Cataclysm beta invite.

I know there are a lot of good reasons to NOT be in the beta, but for me, I dig the secret. Being in the beta is like being in a secret club. I want to know the things they’re talking about. I want to experiment. I want to poke and prod and explore the new content. I especially want to make it impossible for a certain warrior I know to rub his invite in my face.

So I asked Twitter (and my guild): If you had a secret, WoW-related club and I wanted to join, what embarrassing/challenging/ scandalous initiation would you put me through? Some of these people are so devious, they should probably work for Blizzard.

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On Pins & Needles

I was thinking over blog topics this morning and realized I didn’t have a lot to talk about.  I’m working on one that will take a little while, and in the meantime, we’re all just clearing the existing dungeons and trying to keep ourselves interested in WoW until 3.1 comes out.

In the spirit of our impatience, I am going to give you some ideas on way to spend your time while awaiting Ulduar’s release

Top 10 Things To Do While Awaiting Ulduar

10. Level alts or fish.  This is WoW standard–if you’re bored, these might make you appreciate your boredom more.

9.  Take a nap on your keyboard.  You’ll wake up with letters on your face and probably a bunch of confused guildies.

8.  Read trade chat.  This will either force you to buy a nifty new computer after you throw yours out the window or help with number 9.

7.  Become an artist.  Imagine you’re an over-the-top photographer in Northrend, and the Print Screen key is your shutter.  Display your images in a fancy slideshow on your guild or realm forums.

6.  Channel Zack & Miri.  Try to make sexy pics or videos using only WoW characters on a public realm.  No funny business; this is super serial.  Bonus points if you work in NPCs.

5.  Fraps.  Sit in IF and fraps as you run between the forge, auction house, and bank.  Post it on YouTube telling about how you found an amazing hax.  Scoff at the people who tell you they don’t get it.

4.  Pretend you’re an NPC.  Find a group of patrolling NPCs, toggle walk, and stay with them. This is better with talking NPCs, because then you can add your own commentary.  Watch the level 6’s follow you around curiously.

3.  Become a different class.  Log into your druid but talk as if you’re a hunter (or warrior pretend to be shaman, etc).  Complain about how underpowered you are.  If you don’t know what abilities your chosen class has, make them up.  Give yourselves points for each whisper you receive.

2.  Confuse your friends.  Type http://twitter.com in guild.  Then pretend guild chat is twitter.  Update it every few seconds with mundane or weird statuses.  For example:  [Guild] [Ambermist]:  I really wish the cat would stop catching the gophers in the backyard.  My freezer is getting too full.

1.  Make a list.  Obviously, this is my number one.  And it’s your turn; I’d love to see this become a Top 25.

I’d also love to see these things happen.  If you capture a screenshot or video of yourself doing something on the list, email it to me at druidambermist@gmail.com. Please include your character/blog name and the list item.  I’ll display the good ones on my blog if anyone participates.

/beckon Ulduar.  We’re waiting…

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